I received a reading from a friend of mine and it was a very eye opening experience. This was not my first card reading but as I advance through my spiritual journey, the readings I receive are more meaningful and pertinent to my life.
I was given three important words meant to help me along. Those words were boundaries, lies and fertility. The words themselves have meaning alone but I needed to understand how they were connected to one another.
With my friend’s interpretation and time for meditation, I asked myself what those words meant to me and my journey. I was immediately reminded of the walls I put up to protect myself due to insecurities (boundaries). I was also reminded that the lie was the boundary because it did not protect me from what, and whom, protection was needed. Finally, it dawned on me that it was the false boundaries that was preventing my prosperity (fertility).
This is a theme for me so it was not surprising. We are usually tested on the same subject until we learn the lessons we are supposed to learn. Obviously, I’m still learning. What sparked this post was not the reading or what I learned from the reading. It was this morning’s mediation.
While mediating, Spirit asked me to lie down in the divine light and heal. In my subconscious, I did what was asked and found that I still have fear. I discovered that my inner child is scared. Thinking that she was afraid of breaking down the boundaries, I reassured her that we were safe and would continue on the journey successfully. It turns out that my soul was scared of other selves (other souls).
It sounds crazy but my soul recognizes itself and the divine in others. Think of my soul as seeing God in itself and in others. When people harm others or do bad things, my soul, I, feel the pain/hurt/hate as if it is my hand committing crimes against myself. I look at the world like a mirror. I’m pulling double duty, playing both the object and the reflection. I have been told many times that it is not my job to fix other people but somehow I have taken it upon myself overstep the boundary.
But back to the cards and the words. The message this morning was that my spiritual boundary has extended too far, which has in turn made me believe that I am what’s wrong in the world (lies). So as I put up my walls to protect myself, I am actually trapping myself inside with a distorted mirror, perpetuating the lie. In feeling flawed and unworthy, I have forgotten how virtuous and powerful I am.
As emotional beings, we have the bad habit of trying to fix what is outside of our power to fix. Whether it be a child, a parent, a spouse; our hearts feel deeply and take on the perceived emotions of others. When we find we are unsuccessful, we have the tendency to feel failure and contempt for ourselves, as if it was our job to fix people.
We are not responsible for saving people. The message for me was that I need to release the emotional hold I have on the journeys of others so that I can grow spiritually. Although there is unity, as physical beings, we all have different paths to walk. It is not my place to say what actions are appropriate for others.
What emotional influences are holding you back? What do you need to release in order to free yourself from the unnecessary boundaries that are trapping you?