One of the most difficult things I am unlearning is the idea of expectations.
Expectations are a source of disappointment and sadness. Expectations also distract from the present moment and cause us to miss the unexpected greatness of being present.
Society has created a set of rules and boxes that are to define every situation and person. When you don’t fit into those boxes or follow the rules, you are cast out and labeled as of something is wrong with you.
I am unlearning having expectations. This means not expecting people to act and respond in specific ways and accepting their actions and responses as their truth.
I am unlearning the expectations expected of me. I don’t want to feel obligated to do anything that makes me uncomfortable. For a good portion of my life, I put myself in situations that I later regretted. The regret made me feel bad about myself and led me down a road of mental health turmoil.
I am no longer kind for the sake of being kind. My actions are natural and not based on the perceptions others may have of me. I no longer speak to people who purposely disrespect and misunderstand me. If I have expressed hurt from your actions or words and I am disregarded, we don’t have anything else to speak about. I am me, whether society agrees with it or not.
Having low to no expectations has filled me happiness and a freedom I have only felt occasionally. The mental labor of worrying about societal etiquette causes undue stress on an already stressful existence. I want to live, not simply exist.
What are some expectations you place on yourself? On others? How do you feel when you don’t meet those expectations? How do you feel when someone doesn’t meet your expectations?
In order for us to be safe to be ourselves, we must let go of the expectations and just be who we feel is right while not imposing our feelings onto others.
I hope you find your freedom 💚
Look Within 